UFC Ears Lyrics

Whoa, what the fuck is that? What is that? Oh, shit, you scared me with that one. Give me a second. Wait, okay. Okay, here we go. This one’s fun.

He’s a very strong lad
But he hasn’t been laid in years
Because the strong and handsome lad
Has a terrible case of UFC ears
UFC ears, UFC ears
Cauliflower wrestling, UFC ears
UFC ears, UFC ears
Swollen and disfigured UFC ears
He can beat you in the Octagon [laughter]
Afterwards drink 30 beers
But that doesn’t change The horrible fact
He also has a case of UFC ears
UFC ears, UFC ears
Tiny little holes in his UFC ears
UFC ears, UFC ears
Can’t stop looking at those UFC ears
Heavyweight boxers get the broken nose
Ballet dancers Have those fucked up toes
MLB pitchers all have crazy beards
But I can’t believe these guys Can fucking hear
With those UFC ears
UFC ears
Puffy and disturbing UFC ears
UFC ears, that’s right, UFC ears
Cries himself to sleep He’s got UFC ears
Now, after the show tonight
I’ll be shaking With cheeks wet with tears
Because he’s going to find me And beat my fucking head in
Screaming, “Welcome to the club Of UFC ears” [cheers and applause]
Ears
Ears
Ears
Ears

Yeah. Oh my. That’s some smokey shit. This is not from us. There is a fucking fire. Let’s get the fuck out of here. Quick. No, I’m just joking. Don’t… don’t bail on me. – Is that going into your mouth? – [laughter] That’s… Yeah, that’s… [laughs] That’s what she said. Yes. Very good. – [laughter] – That was fun. Really good. I liked that.